I wanna feel what love is


I think I might suffer from narcissistic personality disorder.

My mom is coming to town tomorrow. I can't wait for this part of my life to be over. Meaning: the next three days. I love her, she loves me, it'll be great to see her. I just want it to be done. What will we talk about? What will we do? What will she think of me? Will she tell me I'm fat, stupid, or ugly? Will she tell me I look old? Will she make comments about my lack of furniture? Will she complain that I don't have milk for her coffee?
Or will she arrive with a positive outlook on her own life and mine, excited to see where I'm living, where I like to eat, who I like to hang out with, what color I decided to paint my walls. Will she be polite to people I introduce her to, thankful for the things I introduce her to, excited in general to be introduced to my current life?

I'm scared. And self-pitying. And I can't wait for it to be over with.

I need a vay-kay. (that's short for vacation.) I looked up ticket prices today for new york in june. Plus, I might be traveling to Chicago for work in a couple of months (not really a vacation, but close.)

How any of this relates to narcissistic personality disorder, I dunno. I stumbled across it because I was doing "research" on narcissism and libido because I got in a discussion at work about celebrity sex tapes. So maybe it's just Gene Simmons.

Gawd. I always fall for the bass player.

4 comments:

  1. I don't think people who have narcissistic personality disorder worry about whether they have it or not. Also, yea about NYC. And Chicago too. Perhaps you could visit my sister while you're there.

    Oh, and which celebrity sex tapes? I have to be honest. I'm very interested in seeing the Amy Fisher one.

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  2. i want new posts!

    ideas: update on the mom visit, new observations from the beautiful mind of jessica, funny links to shit... you know, the norm. so get crackin'!

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  3. Thanks for the encouragement. My mom's trip left plenty to talk about - including the fact that she now reads my blog. (sigh.) I'm going to try to ignore that, but... it's been hard to get inspired.
    Plus, my computer's logic board crashed so I have been without for about a week. Expect a post about the beautiful 13in. 160GB shiny white baby that will be arriving at my doorstep this very afternoon.

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  4. A 13 in. 160 GB baby? Is that what a night with Vincent Gallo resulted in?

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